I always have this dream. I mean it is always at the top of my mind. When I close my eyes for a second and really imagine my life it is absolutely surreal. I am in a whole new world where everything is about listening to the music, loving the people, and exploring my surroundings. I feel great energy and I am backed up with faith.
But really this is all a dream and small ambition but I know apart of me is still far away. I need to embrace this part of me. This lover of life and a very large open heart….I read a line today that struck me, "I want to change my life without changing my life." I want to feel happiness right here and now in my own realm. I think I will too.
But i still must listen to my dream to chase that open heart and free soul. I can feel her. It is me. I must chase her because I really want to be her. I am not sure if she is in here, in Provo, maybe, but if not I will go to find her…because honestly I know this dream is me.
Wednesday, January 8, 2014
Thursday, December 5, 2013
I'm like a bird I want to fly away….
Sunday, August 11, 2013
Time.
Isn't it an interesting thing...ah time. Today I have studied hope. Why is it so important to hope. I think is a motivator. Under the most dire of circumstances we must not give up hope. Why? Because it is a absolute motivator that creates optimism and enthusiasm and leads to faith. As we use our agency we are able to move forward in faith.
What is there to hope for?
Enteral Life, Salvation, Happiness, and the ability to become like God. Who am I? Someone who can become a queen and priestess, that is a reason to hope.
Why is there a reason to hope?
Because God love his children and wants us to be happy and because Christ died for us we have the atonement and that is the ultimate hope.
So hope not only requires optimism and enthusiasm is also requires patient perseverance. This brought me to time. Oh how is changes things... though it may seem hard to "wait" wait cheerfully, with purpose, and while moving forward. We all daily need to be progressing not standing still.. We must move forward with "a perfect brightness of hope." We will progress and in time lasting change will come.
I am grateful for time as it has healed my wounds, though a waiting period by seem difficult usually it is worth it. Today I realize often time can give us a chance to respond more lovingly rather than lashing out in the moment. It can provide empathy and patience. May I be comfortable in waiting, moving forward? Yes. Though I am not sure of God's total plan for me, I will move forward and be patient in receiving answers. May I also give others my time, to listen, to empathize, and to be patient with all around me.
Grateful for time, so let me have hope during the passing time, to move forward and love others to
love them sooo much because the best use of my time is to love, to be less self centered and more giving.
Isn't it an interesting thing...ah time. Today I have studied hope. Why is it so important to hope. I think is a motivator. Under the most dire of circumstances we must not give up hope. Why? Because it is a absolute motivator that creates optimism and enthusiasm and leads to faith. As we use our agency we are able to move forward in faith.
What is there to hope for?
Enteral Life, Salvation, Happiness, and the ability to become like God. Who am I? Someone who can become a queen and priestess, that is a reason to hope.
Why is there a reason to hope?
Because God love his children and wants us to be happy and because Christ died for us we have the atonement and that is the ultimate hope.
So hope not only requires optimism and enthusiasm is also requires patient perseverance. This brought me to time. Oh how is changes things... though it may seem hard to "wait" wait cheerfully, with purpose, and while moving forward. We all daily need to be progressing not standing still.. We must move forward with "a perfect brightness of hope." We will progress and in time lasting change will come.
I am grateful for time as it has healed my wounds, though a waiting period by seem difficult usually it is worth it. Today I realize often time can give us a chance to respond more lovingly rather than lashing out in the moment. It can provide empathy and patience. May I be comfortable in waiting, moving forward? Yes. Though I am not sure of God's total plan for me, I will move forward and be patient in receiving answers. May I also give others my time, to listen, to empathize, and to be patient with all around me.
Grateful for time, so let me have hope during the passing time, to move forward and love others to
 |
| Patience through it all...hope, faith, and peace. |
Friday, May 31, 2013
I look strong but feel weak
Carry on.
So maceio..never made it...totally breaks my heart to write that.
I experienced something on my mission that really was remarkable and life changing. I learned to love more fully, to listen without judgement, and understand what matters in life.
It is so simple. All that matters is we love, love, love, and love. We love Christ and represent him. We love human beings, unconditionally because like us, at least me, no one is perfect.
Todos pessos fazem erros. All people make errors. Every person has their own set of trails and struggles. Life is hard and I am pretty sure it keeps getting harder. But we keep moving on because what else can we do, lie down and die? Nah. Life is hard but it is also wonderful. It is full of love, happiness, and peace.
Each of us are on a spiritual journey trying to figure out where and who we need to be.
I think most importantly I have learned to be everyone's biggest fans. I am on the sidelines cheering for every person I pass because I know that every person is going through or has gone through something hard. I think that is Christ too. He is cheering for each of us, for me.
I love the Taylor Swift Song "I was enchanted to meet you." Because I feel that way. Every person I have met has touched me. Each person has something amazing to give. Every one has a strong of faith and struggles, happiness and pain, fear and pure joy.
Right now I am so afraid of life. I am scared to be broken. I am scared to be a disappointment.
All throughout my mission that song "Who am I ?'" from Les Miserables ran through my mind...
Who am I? Who am I?
Who do I want to be and who am I trying to become.
I want to be someone who is kind, thoughtful, and selfless. Those are not things that come easy to me.
I am often fearful and faithless. I have a heart full of desire. It is just hard to make it into action.
Coming home from my mission has been confusing and hard. I look at other sister missionaries and cry because I miss it. It is so hard to think I am even here now, my life practically is all a dream.
It is hard because it is so easy to see my mission slipping away. I am back in the world almost again back to my same ways and I DO NOT want that.
I want my life to be centered on Christ, the only stable thing in my life.
I often think...Could I have just done it? Could I have worked harder? Pushed more? Is God mad? Where is my direction?
Do I think God has stopped loving me? No.
I am stilling trying to figure it out, but I feel like I have distanced myself because of fear of rejection from God. Does the God I know reject? No.
It is hard because I know all the answers but I am still trying to figure out how to put those answers in to action.
This is what I do know: Don't set your own limitations because of fear or lack of faith.
Where do I go from here??
Nao Sei. Mais even though I look strong I am weak. Carry on for now. It gets better I think :)
my new favorite insta: Jesussavesbro
sad to see this go...I miss being there.
xoxo
So maceio..never made it...totally breaks my heart to write that.
I experienced something on my mission that really was remarkable and life changing. I learned to love more fully, to listen without judgement, and understand what matters in life.
It is so simple. All that matters is we love, love, love, and love. We love Christ and represent him. We love human beings, unconditionally because like us, at least me, no one is perfect.
Todos pessos fazem erros. All people make errors. Every person has their own set of trails and struggles. Life is hard and I am pretty sure it keeps getting harder. But we keep moving on because what else can we do, lie down and die? Nah. Life is hard but it is also wonderful. It is full of love, happiness, and peace.
Each of us are on a spiritual journey trying to figure out where and who we need to be.
I think most importantly I have learned to be everyone's biggest fans. I am on the sidelines cheering for every person I pass because I know that every person is going through or has gone through something hard. I think that is Christ too. He is cheering for each of us, for me.
I love the Taylor Swift Song "I was enchanted to meet you." Because I feel that way. Every person I have met has touched me. Each person has something amazing to give. Every one has a strong of faith and struggles, happiness and pain, fear and pure joy.
Right now I am so afraid of life. I am scared to be broken. I am scared to be a disappointment.
All throughout my mission that song "Who am I ?'" from Les Miserables ran through my mind...
Who am I? Who am I?
Who do I want to be and who am I trying to become.
I want to be someone who is kind, thoughtful, and selfless. Those are not things that come easy to me.
I am often fearful and faithless. I have a heart full of desire. It is just hard to make it into action.
Coming home from my mission has been confusing and hard. I look at other sister missionaries and cry because I miss it. It is so hard to think I am even here now, my life practically is all a dream.
It is hard because it is so easy to see my mission slipping away. I am back in the world almost again back to my same ways and I DO NOT want that.
I want my life to be centered on Christ, the only stable thing in my life.
I often think...Could I have just done it? Could I have worked harder? Pushed more? Is God mad? Where is my direction?
Do I think God has stopped loving me? No.
I am stilling trying to figure it out, but I feel like I have distanced myself because of fear of rejection from God. Does the God I know reject? No.
It is hard because I know all the answers but I am still trying to figure out how to put those answers in to action.
This is what I do know: Don't set your own limitations because of fear or lack of faith.
Where do I go from here??
Nao Sei. Mais even though I look strong I am weak. Carry on for now. It gets better I think :)
my new favorite insta: Jesussavesbro
sad to see this go...I miss being there.
xoxo
Tuesday, April 9, 2013
I Love It Here
Ok so so so much to say this first week so it may be long but to start off thanks for all the emails, dear elders, and letters. I can't tell you how much it means. It is true; it really is like the best thing ever to get a package or letter or dear elder. so thanks!!!! It is hard for me to write back to all the letters but I will try my hardest:) but if i don't keep sending them because it seriously is the best and packages xoxo.
This is my address but dearelder.com is another great way to write it is free and I get it the day you write it. my address is
Sister Rebekah Elton
MTC mailbox #298
BRA-MAC 0514
2005 N 900 E
Provo, UT
84604
Oi familia and amigos. Tudo bem???
haha that is about how much Portuguese I know ha ha but everyone keeps saying the language will come so lets pray it does. I am starting to understand it but it is still really hard. But i think the most important thing is to not get too down about it cause it is all good:) SO i miss you guys a lot and love so much to hear from you but to be honest I love it here! there are hard days and long days but I know I doing this for the Lord. We keep listening to come come ye saints and every time I think about you dad. "happy day!" and that is what is here. It can be overwhelming but i just have a good attitude and have fun. haha my MTC teach asked my what I like to do and I said have fun haha and when that answer wasn't sufficient i said I love to look at architecture. haha everyone in my district legit thinks i am a hippie. I kinda love it because you all know that is a hidden dream of mine.
The MTC living and food is good! I don't know why everyone complains about it so much! i love the salads, wraps, and onion rings. There is tons of choices though and i eat fruit with PB everyday and grapefruits with salt.
So I taught my first investigator last week on Friday. It was really hard because we had to teach in Portuguese. I just sat there is smiled while my fluent (pratically haha) companion talked. Then I managed to get out Dues is my amigo and casa muta bem energia. God is my friend and your house has a nice energy. I am sure he thought I was a trip, anyways we taught him again yesterday and I cried while saying my tesitmony. It is crazy how much love you get for your investigators, i honestly already care so much about them.
My companion is amazing and so sweet we get along very well. Word to all the future missionaries out there...don't stress to much, give it your all, and know God will accept your efforts but still have fun. Don't be that missionary that doesn't work but I have learned work hard and give the Lord everything but still have fun and be happy.
Other than crying in my lesson, no tears so far. I miss you guys though I promise, but this is the most amazing work I have done. Honestly it is so different and so hard but it is an unreal experience.
Ok so mom, sarah, and gracee make sure you watch the YW general broardcast. Promise me? It is so amazing. I watched it over the weekend and it made me think of you guys especially the girl going to the temple video. I loved how it showed a mission before temple marriage. I would encourage any girl to go. I love you sarah and gracee you are such beautiful daughters of God.
Christain you will absolutely love the MTC just remember to be happy, selfless, and completely dedicated to the lord, and it will be an amazing spiritual high.
It is so amazing how many sisters are here! It really is a rising generation. They are all so beautiful and stylish too. Girls if you are super stressed out on what to bring stop stressing just bring cute stuff that is you. Like for sure try to follow the guidelines but really anything seems to go.
It is probably only because I am now serving but I felt as all of general conference was directed to missionaries. Reminding us all to be missionaries and to be obedient. I loved the talk by L. Whitney Clayton on marriage because it seems crazy but now I am on my mission I think about marriage and family even more than before. I really feel like I am preparing for my future family and the person I am becoming will help me be a better wife and mother. We each have so much to look forward too and now is the time to prepare.
Wow! wasn't conference amazing??? I could talk about it all day. I kept noticing the story of Daniel seeing the rock come forth looking like a stone without hands with righteous members.. That is us! YAY!!!! we are doing the lords work.
I think before I came I thought about myself a lot and my own personal needs but I have learned this:
Quote of the week: We will be the LORD's missionaries." (to bring the world his truth) honestly this is so true and the sooner you find that out the better we are here soly for the Lord. I don't doubt I will reap many rewards but that is not at all my purpose. I am here only for the Lord. I have leaned to be real, have fun, and be mysellf. Work hard. and enjoy my time because it seriously flies.
oh yes btw most people going Brazil are getting reassigned to bills, Montana or Cali or Texas. So I will not be surprised if it happens to me. but its ok my zone leader said this "how tight is to be a missionary that is need in 2 areas"
I feel like this is my own spiritual journey it is not easy but so worth it. xoxo
anyways I love you all so much!!!!! please write and email I am trying to write today... also with any questions love love love love xoxo
Sister Elton
Tuesday, April 2, 2013
So they say it is hard but worth it...
Okay so these last few days have been so stressful finishing packing was crazy just because there is so much u need or at least feel like you do.
Ahh!!! Yes I had a mental break down 2 actually! I am lucky at a least have my amazing family to help:)
But it all worked out.. As it always does it was interesting because I have heard that people are usually tempted a lot before their mission but that wasn't really the case for me when times got hard or I felt like why am I doing this? I felt constant encouragement. I have really felt though this whole process of getting ready God says bek u can do this. You are strong. You are meant to be on a mission. And this has meant so much because it can seem crazy to serve sometimes.
Anyways to girls like me who said I are. To wait 4 1/2 months to leave???? What!??? I was not excited about it but honestly it flew by! So fast so enjoy your time, prepare, and spend time with family and friends!
My setting apart was such a surreal experience! I mean am I really sister Elton right now?? It is just so insane. Yes, I balled my eyes out. Just because I can't tell you how much I will miss my family. But I know for a fact this is the right thing. It is such an amazing opportunity to serve and dedicate the next year and a half to God. It will be hard and a journey but I know God is with me to provide constant encouragement!:) I am so grateful for that!
I enter the MTC tomorrow. Sooo my life is about to drastically change! I feel ready but lets see how this next week treats me haha 6:30 am arising just might kill me !
The next blog post and all the posts here on out will be posted by my sweet mom.
Photo: amazing fam I will miss the crap out of:)
So
Xoxo and tchau:)
Ahh!!! Yes I had a mental break down 2 actually! I am lucky at a least have my amazing family to help:)
But it all worked out.. As it always does it was interesting because I have heard that people are usually tempted a lot before their mission but that wasn't really the case for me when times got hard or I felt like why am I doing this? I felt constant encouragement. I have really felt though this whole process of getting ready God says bek u can do this. You are strong. You are meant to be on a mission. And this has meant so much because it can seem crazy to serve sometimes.
Anyways to girls like me who said I are. To wait 4 1/2 months to leave???? What!??? I was not excited about it but honestly it flew by! So fast so enjoy your time, prepare, and spend time with family and friends!
My setting apart was such a surreal experience! I mean am I really sister Elton right now?? It is just so insane. Yes, I balled my eyes out. Just because I can't tell you how much I will miss my family. But I know for a fact this is the right thing. It is such an amazing opportunity to serve and dedicate the next year and a half to God. It will be hard and a journey but I know God is with me to provide constant encouragement!:) I am so grateful for that!
I enter the MTC tomorrow. Sooo my life is about to drastically change! I feel ready but lets see how this next week treats me haha 6:30 am arising just might kill me !
The next blog post and all the posts here on out will be posted by my sweet mom.
Photo: amazing fam I will miss the crap out of:)
So
Xoxo and tchau:)
Thursday, March 28, 2013
It's less than a week
Sooo crazy that I leave in less than a week! It has total flown by! If u are anticipating ur own leave date into the mission field u might feel a little like me right now!!! I am freaking out! Like I just feel so weird like should I really go? Apparently these feelings are completely normal! So I didn't end up getting my visa so I am headed to the Provo MTC at 12:30 on Wednesday! I am super exited but also super nervous! If u are also like me then packing was very stressful!! I didn't realize how much stuff I had to get and sister missionary clothes can be hard to find! However I found a lot of cute outfits! And they are practical! I heard those are the best:) I will tag some photos!!:)
Friends: so just plan on all ur friends wanting to go to lunch with u the last week before u go. I have eaten out everyday this week haha!
Family: spend a lot of time with theme u will miss them most and they will ch age a lot!
Packing: I will have to post about this one later it could possibly be a nightmare:)
Anyways I am so excited to go! But my feelings are just so mixed because it is just going to be a whole new life and I am very scared!
Photos: one last time with friends:) I'll post an outfits post later today
Xoxo
Soon to be sister Elton
Friends: so just plan on all ur friends wanting to go to lunch with u the last week before u go. I have eaten out everyday this week haha!
Family: spend a lot of time with theme u will miss them most and they will ch age a lot!
Packing: I will have to post about this one later it could possibly be a nightmare:)
Anyways I am so excited to go! But my feelings are just so mixed because it is just going to be a whole new life and I am very scared!
Photos: one last time with friends:) I'll post an outfits post later today
Xoxo
Soon to be sister Elton
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